From the recording Queen City Rag


Coffee Bourgeois Blues

I woke up in the morning at a quarter past eight
Another day late, but work’s gotta wait
I walked to the mirror, but to my surprise
I couldn’t see a thing out of both of my eyes
I rubbed on my head, I was quite appalled
This morning I woke up I was blind and bald

I tripped down the street to Baba Budan’s
Tony the owner said “Whatcha having there, man?”
I couldn’t quite speak, I was bald, I couldn’t see
Tony said, “Jake (Speed), I know what you need”
I took one sip, saw my hair start to grow
I said Tony, you make one mean, mad cup of joe

Oo wa Oo wa Oo wa oo Black Coffee
Oo wa Oo wa Oo, No Sugar, No cream
Oo wa Oo wa Oo wa ee, I want Coffee that Cares Not Coffee that’s Cheap

I said “Tony, your Coffee has done it again
It put my hair right back on my big bald head
Tony looked bitter, he spoke with a frown
Have a last cup, cuz I’m a closing down
I yelled What!, he said look and see
I saw six Starbucks open up across the street

I turned back to Tony, my eyes full of fright
My mouth wide shouting out This Ain’t Right
In the time it took to say them words
Two more Starbucks opened on the curb
I thought ah man, I must be losing my mind
As I was thinking they was building Starbucks #9


On a caffeine rush I ran across the street
I poured into Starbuck’s store #3
I screamed at the clerk “Who owns this Place?!”
I wanna speak to’em right now, face to face
The clerk girl smiled with a face confused
Sir, I don’t know, but our coffee’s fresh brewed

Like Wild Bill Clinton, I blew my lid
I said, I don’t want your coffee, I don’t want one sip
I’d rather lick dirt that’s sticking to the floor
Than drink black coffee in a Starbucks store
And by the way does your coffee cure a blind bald man?
No, I did not think so and out the door I ran


I returned to Tony at Baba’s café
I was mad I was mean I was having a bad day
Tony’s head dropped, he showed me the check
Got bought by the big shot business exec (with the tie around his neck)
I fought to focus but I was losing my sight
As my hair fell out I shouted This Ain’t Right

I stood there lost, lonesome, and late
tried to get to work but I couldn’t find the way
gonna get fired gonna let me go
on account of I was fighting for a mad cup of joe
I may be bald, I may be blind
But I know my coffee, and I know what I like